Do Gummi Bears Dream of Rubber Passion Fruit?
Thursday, July 03, 2008
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It is July 3, 2008, and the Tampa Bay Rays are in 1st place.
People laughed at me when I told them, during the off season, that the Rays would compete for the Wildcard next year. And I was purposefully tempering my excitement for this year's Rays team. I had a feeling they could compete this year for the Wildcard. The Yanks are something of a mess as they try to figure out wheather they'd like to buy their championships (which wasn't working so well lately) or if they should grow their own talent and win championships that way. And, as it stands, they're pretty far behind the enormous depth Tampa has in their farm system, which will keep them rich in talent for at least the next 5 years, most likely a lot more. And the Orioles-- well, that team is just poorly run and has no solid pitching or foundation. The Blue Jays have a pretty good team, but they can't seem to get it together. And then, of course, we all just assume the Red Sox will own 1st. But they don't! Not as of July 3, 2008. The Red Sox are without David Ortiz, but that's no excuse. I've heard the Sox fans already coming up with a list of excuses because they've become the New Yankees, and that means Sox fans feel entitled to 1st place and a playoff berth each season. Problem is, the Rays may just be a better team-- at the very least, it can't be argued that they're not on equal ground, not anymore. Of course, the Rays have also fielded a team that can flat out beat the mighty mighty Red Sox (as evidenced in this week's SWEEP) with about 20% the payroll the Red Sox have.
Also, it is July 3, 2008, and the San Francisco Giants are in 3rd place.
I, of course, was predicting a 100+ loss season-- not that halfway thru the season they'd be a mere 5 games out of 1st. Of course, after last season, where the NL West was arguably the best division in the NL, I could never have predicted just how remarkably bad the West would be this year. The West is so bad that the Giants have lost 48 games and they could-- with a little luck --actually wind up in the playoffs this year. The first place Diamondbacks, as of today, July 3, 2008, have a record of 42 wins and 43 losses. They have a losing record and are in 1st place! I don't know if I can recall anything like this happening before. A team is in 1st place in their division with a losing record halfway thru the season. Remarkable.
What's even more remarkable is that if the Giants actually made it to the playoffs they may stand a chance to advance past that round simply because Lincecum knocks the bats out of the hands of opposing batters. And Cain could be getting his shit together. And then there's Jonathan Sanchez, who has finally come into his own as a potential ace. And as the 1st round of the playoffs in baseball is a best of 5 series, the Giants need only win 3 to advance. Those 3 pitchers could hand them those victories almost single-handedly.
Of course, just winding up in 1st will take a lot of luck, and an even worse collapse within the West, which is unlikely. The collapse of the West is so bad, it's hard to believe it could get any worse. The Giants are in 3rd place! Ludicrous! That means there are two teams worse than the Giants? Are you fucking kidding me?
But that's why we fucking love this game (it's not a game!). Tampa Bay is in 1st in the impossibly tough AL East, and the Giants are in 3rd-- though, by all rights, they should be in last with no hope whatsoever of even thinking about the playoffs.
It is July 3, 2008, and the Tampa Bay Rays are in 1st place.
People laughed at me when I told them, during the off season, that the Rays would compete for the Wildcard next year. And I was purposefully tempering my excitement for this year's Rays team. I had a feeling they could compete this year for the Wildcard. The Yanks are something of a mess as they try to figure out wheather they'd like to buy their championships (which wasn't working so well lately) or if they should grow their own talent and win championships that way. And, as it stands, they're pretty far behind the enormous depth Tampa has in their farm system, which will keep them rich in talent for at least the next 5 years, most likely a lot more. And the Orioles-- well, that team is just poorly run and has no solid pitching or foundation. The Blue Jays have a pretty good team, but they can't seem to get it together. And then, of course, we all just assume the Red Sox will own 1st. But they don't! Not as of July 3, 2008. The Red Sox are without David Ortiz, but that's no excuse. I've heard the Sox fans already coming up with a list of excuses because they've become the New Yankees, and that means Sox fans feel entitled to 1st place and a playoff berth each season. Problem is, the Rays may just be a better team-- at the very least, it can't be argued that they're not on equal ground, not anymore. Of course, the Rays have also fielded a team that can flat out beat the mighty mighty Red Sox (as evidenced in this week's SWEEP) with about 20% the payroll the Red Sox have.
Also, it is July 3, 2008, and the San Francisco Giants are in 3rd place.
I, of course, was predicting a 100+ loss season-- not that halfway thru the season they'd be a mere 5 games out of 1st. Of course, after last season, where the NL West was arguably the best division in the NL, I could never have predicted just how remarkably bad the West would be this year. The West is so bad that the Giants have lost 48 games and they could-- with a little luck --actually wind up in the playoffs this year. The first place Diamondbacks, as of today, July 3, 2008, have a record of 42 wins and 43 losses. They have a losing record and are in 1st place! I don't know if I can recall anything like this happening before. A team is in 1st place in their division with a losing record halfway thru the season. Remarkable.
What's even more remarkable is that if the Giants actually made it to the playoffs they may stand a chance to advance past that round simply because Lincecum knocks the bats out of the hands of opposing batters. And Cain could be getting his shit together. And then there's Jonathan Sanchez, who has finally come into his own as a potential ace. And as the 1st round of the playoffs in baseball is a best of 5 series, the Giants need only win 3 to advance. Those 3 pitchers could hand them those victories almost single-handedly.
Of course, just winding up in 1st will take a lot of luck, and an even worse collapse within the West, which is unlikely. The collapse of the West is so bad, it's hard to believe it could get any worse. The Giants are in 3rd place! Ludicrous! That means there are two teams worse than the Giants? Are you fucking kidding me?
But that's why we fucking love this game (it's not a game!). Tampa Bay is in 1st in the impossibly tough AL East, and the Giants are in 3rd-- though, by all rights, they should be in last with no hope whatsoever of even thinking about the playoffs.
Labels: baseball, San Francisco Giants, Tampa Bay Rays
¶ 10:00 AM 2 comments
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
A's vs. Rays
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After buying the cheapest tickets available (Plaza Reserved, $9) we waited 2 innings and took some seats in the second level just behind home plate. James Shields had already given up 2 HRs and was about to give up another to the BIG HURT (not in picture). Score: 2-0, A's
Much later, around the 10th, we go on down and take seats right behind the A's dugout. Jason Hammel is trying to excel at relieving after beginning the season as a starter. Score: 5 -5
Another angle. Same score.
Manager Joe Maddon (in front, on left)! You may remember that in in June of '07 I awarded Mr. Maddon the coveted prize of BEST EYEWEAR IN BASEBALL.
Evan Longoria hits a two-run HR in the top of the 13th! (this photo was taken much earlier, actually. And I know I look funky, but I've grown humble in my old age.) Score: 7 - 5, Rays
Evan Longoria, Fox Sports Florida wants to interview you! You're a HERO!
Future ultra-super-all-star.
After buying the cheapest tickets available (Plaza Reserved, $9) we waited 2 innings and took some seats in the second level just behind home plate. James Shields had already given up 2 HRs and was about to give up another to the BIG HURT (not in picture). Score: 2-0, A's
Much later, around the 10th, we go on down and take seats right behind the A's dugout. Jason Hammel is trying to excel at relieving after beginning the season as a starter. Score: 5 -5
Another angle. Same score.
Manager Joe Maddon (in front, on left)! You may remember that in in June of '07 I awarded Mr. Maddon the coveted prize of BEST EYEWEAR IN BASEBALL.
Evan Longoria hits a two-run HR in the top of the 13th! (this photo was taken much earlier, actually. And I know I look funky, but I've grown humble in my old age.) Score: 7 - 5, Rays
Evan Longoria, Fox Sports Florida wants to interview you! You're a HERO!
Future ultra-super-all-star..
I have to say, I love going to the A's ballpark because Oakland doesn't support their team and I can go and hoot and holler for some team from Florida and be allowed to strut all over the place, taking any goddamned seat I want. When I go to the Oakland Colliseum, I am KING.
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Actually, when I jumped up and cheered for Evan's HR in the top of the 13th we were still behind the A's dugout and some fans there got pretty pissed off with me. We promptly moved over to behind the Rays dugout and were suddenly surrounded by about a dozen Rays fans . We assumed they were wives and family (had to be -- I'm positive I'm the ONLY unaffiliated Rays fan in all of CA), as James Shields and Evan Longoria are both from CA.
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Great fucking game. Got home at 12:30am. I may go again tonight and just try to get behind the Rays dugout a little earlier.
Labels: baseball
¶ 8:57 AM 0 comments
Friday, April 11, 2008
MY NICKNAMES FOR MY FAVORITE MLB TEAMS
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San Francisco Giants
Omar "The Pink Flamingo" Vizquel
Ray "Ray" Durham
Eugenio "The Goat" Velez
Rich "Uh..." Aurillia
Brian "I'd Love To Stay But I'm Too Much Of A" Bocock*
Kevin "Achilles" Frandsen
Aaron "Oh I'm Such A Gamer -- Did They Tell You About That One Time I Broke My Nose Running Into The Wall And I Still Held On To The Ball For The Out -- Did They Tell You About That One Time -- Oh I'm Such A Total Fucking Gamer -- I'm A Gamer" Rowand
Randy "The Shnooze" Winn
"Ready" Freddie Lewis
Rajai "Wheels" Davis
Benji "It Sux Being The Oldest Brother" Molina
Nate "The Stone Mason" Schierholtz
Matt "Twist Of" Cain**
Tim "Link" Lincecum***
Barry "So Much Time, So Much Money, So Many Celebrity Girlfriends, So Little Talent" Zito
Noah "No K" Lowry
Jonathan "Fireball" Sanchez****
Kevin "Coco" Correia
Brian "The Crime Dog" Wilson
Merkin "The Magician" Valdez
Eric "Three" Threets "To The Wind"
_________________________________________
*Brian Bocock is a shortstop, so "Deep In the Hole" is his other nickname.*****
**I also reserve the right to call Matt Cain "Sugar".
***Yes, this is in referrence to The Legend Of Zelda. Take a look at lil Timmy and tell me that, combined with his last name, that Link isn't the PERFECT nickname for him.
****Jonathan Sanchez's other nickname, of course, is "Dirty".******
*****Don't send me pissy emails because of that one.
******Or that one, either.
San Francisco Giants
Omar "The Pink Flamingo" Vizquel
Ray "Ray" Durham
Eugenio "The Goat" Velez
Rich "Uh..." Aurillia
Brian "I'd Love To Stay But I'm Too Much Of A" Bocock*
Kevin "Achilles" Frandsen
Aaron "Oh I'm Such A Gamer -- Did They Tell You About That One Time I Broke My Nose Running Into The Wall And I Still Held On To The Ball For The Out -- Did They Tell You About That One Time -- Oh I'm Such A Total Fucking Gamer -- I'm A Gamer" Rowand
Randy "The Shnooze" Winn
"Ready" Freddie Lewis
Rajai "Wheels" Davis
Benji "It Sux Being The Oldest Brother" Molina
Nate "The Stone Mason" Schierholtz
Matt "Twist Of" Cain**
Tim "Link" Lincecum***
Barry "So Much Time, So Much Money, So Many Celebrity Girlfriends, So Little Talent" Zito
Noah "No K" Lowry
Jonathan "Fireball" Sanchez****
Kevin "Coco" Correia
Brian "The Crime Dog" Wilson
Merkin "The Magician" Valdez
Eric "Three" Threets "To The Wind"
_________________________________________
*Brian Bocock is a shortstop, so "Deep In the Hole" is his other nickname.*****
**I also reserve the right to call Matt Cain "Sugar".
***Yes, this is in referrence to The Legend Of Zelda. Take a look at lil Timmy and tell me that, combined with his last name, that Link isn't the PERFECT nickname for him.
****Jonathan Sanchez's other nickname, of course, is "Dirty".******
*****Don't send me pissy emails because of that one.
******Or that one, either.
Labels: baseball
¶ 9:48 AM 4 comments
Wednesday, April 09, 2008
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My favorite quote from today:
"And the giants won on a walk-off homer from Benji Molina in the 11th (or was it the 12th?). Go figure. If I were an MLB team that lost to the Giants I'd probably shoot myself and everyone else affiliated with me."
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .. . . . . . . . . .--Logan Ryan Smith
My favorite quote from today:
"And the giants won on a walk-off homer from Benji Molina in the 11th (or was it the 12th?). Go figure. If I were an MLB team that lost to the Giants I'd probably shoot myself and everyone else affiliated with me."
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .. . . . . . . . . .--Logan Ryan Smith
Labels: baseball
¶ 11:37 AM 0 comments
Thursday, April 03, 2008
MY NICKNAMES FOR MY FAVORITE MLB TEAMS
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KANSAS CITY ROYALS
Billy "Butterball" Butler
Alex "A-gord" Gordon*
Tony "F'n" Pena
Ross "The Gloss" Gload
Ryan "The Shitkicker" Shealy
Joey "The Gymnist" Gathright
Mark "Hen Tea" Teahen
Estaban "Ich Bin Ein Auslander" German
John "Uncle" Buck
David "The Alpha and the Omega" DeJesus
Jose "Da Juice" Guillen
Zack "Saved By the Bell" Grienke
Gil "Popeye" Meche**
Brian "The Brain" Bannister
Brett "What the Fuck Am I Doing on a Major League Team" Tomko
John "Hey Now" Bale
Joakim "I'm Not Sorry" Soria
________________________________________________
*This nickname was actually coined by Brandon Brown, not me.
**BB has also reminded me that Gil Meche's nickname is actually Gil "Ga" Meche, of course. Somehow that slipped my mind. That one is credited to both of us as we both came up with it independently of the other.
KANSAS CITY ROYALS
Billy "Butterball" Butler
Alex "A-gord" Gordon*
Tony "F'n" Pena
Ross "The Gloss" Gload
Ryan "The Shitkicker" Shealy
Joey "The Gymnist" Gathright
Mark "Hen Tea" Teahen
Estaban "Ich Bin Ein Auslander" German
John "Uncle" Buck
David "The Alpha and the Omega" DeJesus
Jose "Da Juice" Guillen
Zack "Saved By the Bell" Grienke
Gil "Popeye" Meche**
Brian "The Brain" Bannister
Brett "What the Fuck Am I Doing on a Major League Team" Tomko
John "Hey Now" Bale
Joakim "I'm Not Sorry" Soria
________________________________________________
*This nickname was actually coined by Brandon Brown, not me.
**BB has also reminded me that Gil Meche's nickname is actually Gil "Ga" Meche, of course. Somehow that slipped my mind. That one is credited to both of us as we both came up with it independently of the other.
Labels: baseball
¶ 12:34 PM 2 comments
Monday, March 31, 2008
kudos to washington d.c.!
Last night was Opening Night, featuring the Washington Nationals vs. Atlanta Braves. George Bush threw out the "first pitch" and D.C. welcomed him with some serious booing. I didn't see that coming, but that's fucking awesome. Way to go, D.C.
Last night was Opening Night, featuring the Washington Nationals vs. Atlanta Braves. George Bush threw out the "first pitch" and D.C. welcomed him with some serious booing. I didn't see that coming, but that's fucking awesome. Way to go, D.C.
Labels: baseball
¶ 9:16 AM 0 comments
Thursday, March 27, 2008
HOLY SHIT. OMG. HOW MOFUCKIN' EMBARASSING.
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Yes, that's right, my Giants, yesterday in an exhibition game, LOST to their triple-A minor league affiliate, the Fresno Grizzlies. Holy shit. This is remarkable. The Giants may just have exactly what I've predicted-- THE WORST TEAM IN THE ENTIRE HISTORY OF MAJOR LEAGUE BASEBALL. Apparently, in 1899, the Cleveland Spiders lost 134 games and hold the record for worst MLB season ever. Well, scootch on over there Cleveland, here comes SF to lose 135. Oh, it shall be mofuckin' glorious. The humanity!
They couldn't even beat the triple-A team! HOLY SHIT!
HOLY SHIT!
HOLY SHIT!
Yes, that's right, my Giants, yesterday in an exhibition game, LOST to their triple-A minor league affiliate, the Fresno Grizzlies. Holy shit. This is remarkable. The Giants may just have exactly what I've predicted-- THE WORST TEAM IN THE ENTIRE HISTORY OF MAJOR LEAGUE BASEBALL. Apparently, in 1899, the Cleveland Spiders lost 134 games and hold the record for worst MLB season ever. Well, scootch on over there Cleveland, here comes SF to lose 135. Oh, it shall be mofuckin' glorious. The humanity!
They couldn't even beat the triple-A team! HOLY SHIT!
HOLY SHIT!
HOLY SHIT!
Labels: baseball
¶ 10:14 AM 4 comments
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
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I'm stealing this idea from the Murph and Mac Morning Show, but the Giants new slogan for the 2008 season is (drumroll please)...
IT JUST DOESN'T MATER!
Please, take a look at yr San Francisco Giants 2008 team and repeat with me:
IT JUST DOESN'T MATTER!
IT JUST DOESN'T MATTER!
IT JUST DOESN'T MATTER!
IT JUST DOESN'T MATTER!
This, of course, was taken from Meatballs, which Murph and Mac were talking about this morning in regard to Spring Training. But, come on, I think they have to know that it really should be applied to the entire '08 season.
Over a big picture of Barry Zito on the mound, rubbing his forehead in despair, could be his 7 year, $126 Million contract, and below him it could read:
IT JUST DOESN'T MATTER!
Now, that would be a great marketing campaign. Posters everywhere! On the sides of buses! In the subway! Flying shamelessly from city street lights! Oh, it'd be glorious. Another one could be a picture of the soon-to-be 41 year-old Vizquel and a blank spot next to him in the shape of a body-- that one could read:
When Your SF Giants 41-year-old Shortstop Gets Injured, Who's His Backup?
IT JUST DOESN'T MATTER!
And another could be a team photo that reads:
What Do You Do When You Have a Team Full of Centerfielders Hitting Like Shortstops?
IT JUST DOESN'T MATTER!
It's very inspiring. I'm inspired. Just thinking those words makes the whole prospect of a 100-loss season for the Giants OK. Really, it's just fine. In fact, with that slogan in mind, I'm sort of rooting for the Giants to have THE WORST record in the history of Major League Baseball. Why? Beacuase...
IT JUST DOESN'T MATTER!
Here's the speech Bill Murray gave in MEATBALLS, from which those inspiring words were lifted:
"And even if we win, if we win, HAH! Even if we play so far above our heads that our noses bleed for a week to ten days; even if God in Heaven above points his hand at our side of the field; even if every man woman and child joined hands together and prayed for us to win, it just wouldn't matter because all the really good looking girls would still go out with the guys from Mohawk because they've got all the money! It just doesn't matter if we win or if we lose. IT JUST DOESN'T MATTER! Rest of group: IT JUST DOESN'T MATTER! IT JUST DOESN'T MATTER..."
I'm stealing this idea from the Murph and Mac Morning Show, but the Giants new slogan for the 2008 season is (drumroll please)...
IT JUST DOESN'T MATER!
Please, take a look at yr San Francisco Giants 2008 team and repeat with me:
IT JUST DOESN'T MATTER!
IT JUST DOESN'T MATTER!
IT JUST DOESN'T MATTER!
IT JUST DOESN'T MATTER!
This, of course, was taken from Meatballs, which Murph and Mac were talking about this morning in regard to Spring Training. But, come on, I think they have to know that it really should be applied to the entire '08 season.
Over a big picture of Barry Zito on the mound, rubbing his forehead in despair, could be his 7 year, $126 Million contract, and below him it could read:
IT JUST DOESN'T MATTER!
Now, that would be a great marketing campaign. Posters everywhere! On the sides of buses! In the subway! Flying shamelessly from city street lights! Oh, it'd be glorious. Another one could be a picture of the soon-to-be 41 year-old Vizquel and a blank spot next to him in the shape of a body-- that one could read:
When Your SF Giants 41-year-old Shortstop Gets Injured, Who's His Backup?
IT JUST DOESN'T MATTER!
And another could be a team photo that reads:
What Do You Do When You Have a Team Full of Centerfielders Hitting Like Shortstops?
IT JUST DOESN'T MATTER!
It's very inspiring. I'm inspired. Just thinking those words makes the whole prospect of a 100-loss season for the Giants OK. Really, it's just fine. In fact, with that slogan in mind, I'm sort of rooting for the Giants to have THE WORST record in the history of Major League Baseball. Why? Beacuase...
IT JUST DOESN'T MATTER!
Here's the speech Bill Murray gave in MEATBALLS, from which those inspiring words were lifted:
"And even if we win, if we win, HAH! Even if we play so far above our heads that our noses bleed for a week to ten days; even if God in Heaven above points his hand at our side of the field; even if every man woman and child joined hands together and prayed for us to win, it just wouldn't matter because all the really good looking girls would still go out with the guys from Mohawk because they've got all the money! It just doesn't matter if we win or if we lose. IT JUST DOESN'T MATTER! Rest of group: IT JUST DOESN'T MATTER! IT JUST DOESN'T MATTER..."
Labels: baseball
¶ 9:39 AM 0 comments
Friday, February 29, 2008
2008 BASEBALL PREDICTIONS
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In response to Orth's hillarious baseball predictions, I will do my own. But I'm not going to be as funny, because I can't.
AL EAST
1. Boston Red Sox
2. New York Yankees
3. Tampa Bay Rays
4. Toronto Blue Jays
5. Baltimore Orioles
In Orth's predictions he has the Rays at 4th place. Apparently I convinced him that the Rays were talented enough to not end up in last place. Problem is, they're better than the Blue Jays, hands down. The Blue Jays may have the edge on pitching, but overall, the Rays are better-- they have superstar quality position players like Carl Crawford, Carlos Pena, and BJ Upton with Evan Longoria coming up this season to possibly pull off a Ryan Braun-type of a season. Not to mention that Longoria's spot at 3rd means Akinora Iwamura moves to second, thus making that one hell of a solid fucking infield-- Jason Bartlett at SS, from what I hear, plays remarkable defense. Not one week spot. Then their pitching is solid with 3 top notch starters in Kasmir, Shields and Garza, and a whole host of talent, possibly equal to those 3, fighting to get the last two spots in the rotation. In any other division, the Rays are competing for 1st place all season long. Unfortunately the Yankees and Red Sox will own that division forever. That said, I could see the Yanks having a real off season and dropping to 3rd with the Rays shocking everyone and taking 2nd place and competing for the AL Wild Card come September.
AL CENTRAL
1. Detroit Tigers
2. Cleavland Indians
3. Minnesota Twins
4. Kansas City Royals
5. Chicago White Sox
Again, here, I mostly agree with Orth; but, again, I'm switching the 3rd and 4th spots. The Twins no longer have Johann Santana, but they do have Francisco Liriano. Sure Liriano didn't pitch at all in 2007 due to Tommy John surgery, but he should be ready to go this season and he has Santana-esque talent. So, if all goes well, he essentially replaces Santana. I also think Boof Bonser will step up this year to be a seriously good starting pitcher. He has the potential for being a terrific strikeout pitcher. And not to mention that the Twins still have Joe Nathan closing out games for them, as well as one of the best hitting catchers in Joe Mauer. The addition of Delmon Young, I think, makes up for the loss of Tori Hunter. Young will be a better offensive force than Hunter, and his defense is on par; and Young has THE BEST arm of all Major League outfielders-- and yes, that means it's better than Vlad Guerrero's. Also, Carlos Gomez could be a hotshot for the Twins. I love the Royals, but they're not beating out the very consistent Minnesota Twins this year. And like the AL East, there's not much to say about the #1 team, because it almost goes without saying that the Tigers will whomp all over the AL Central. Their lineup is fucking ridiculous, and they have real, real good pitching.
AL WEST
1. L.A. Angels
2. Seattle Mariners
3. Texas Rangers
4. Oakland A's
This division is just not that interesting. I agree with Orth's predictions here. HOWEVER, if the Mariners wise up and sign Barry Bonds to a cheap one-year contract as their DH, that might just be enough of an edge for them to walk away with this division. The Rangers will be a better team because of Jarrod Saltalamachia and Josh Hamilton, and their offense was already pretty strong, and it will only get better. They might surprise everyone and take this division, actually. And the A's just stink. Boy do they stink.
NL EAST
1. NY Mets
2. Philadelphia Phillies
3. Atlanta Braves
4. Washington Nationals
5. Florida Marlins
Once again, I mostly agree with Orth except for those 3rd and 4th spots. The Braves are too solid, too consistent not to at least nab 3rd place. And they have Mark Texiera for the full season in '08. Again, the Braves are a team that I'm picking for 3rd, but could take the division. However, the Braves are less likely than the Rangers because the Mets are just too strong with the addition of Johann Santana, and the Phillies fortified their pitching by moving Brett Myers back into the rotation and signing Brad Lidge as their closer. And they've improved their infield from last season with the addition of Pedro Feliz who will play Gold Glove-caliber defense and knock in about 30 HRs due to the smaller ballpark he now calls home.
NL CENTRAL
1. Chicago Cubs
2. Milwaukee Brewers
3. Reds
4. Houston Astros
5. St. Louis Cardinals
6. Pittsburgh Pirates
Yes, that's right, the Cubs will take the NL Central. They did last season, and they're even better this year with the addition of Kosuke Fokudome, who, from all the reports I've read, *will* be like a cross between Ichiro and Matzusaka. On top of that, I think Rich Hill is prone for a break-out year, and Felix Pie will provide terrific defense in center all season long. The Reds have a great team, but Dusty Baker will break all of those pitchers arms when he leaves them out there for 140/ 145 pitches per game. And the Cardinals fucking blow. If it wasn't for Pujols, they may as well call themselves the St. Louis Pirates.
NL WEST
1. Arizona Diamondbacks
2. Colorado Rockies
3. San Diego Padres
4. L.A. Dodgers
5. S.F. Giants
Ah, yes. My beloved NL West. Oh, Giants, why have you forsaken me so? Actually, it's all yr fault Brian Sabean. OFF WITH HIS HEAD! OFF WITH HIS HEAD! Anyway, yeah, the D'backs have Dan Haren now and their pitching wasn't too shabby last year when they won the division. They're going to roll over the west for that reason, and also because the youth that helped them get to the playoffs last year will be better for their experience. Chris Young, for instance, is going to have a MONSTER season, and Stephen Drew is going to finally get his shit together and hit .290 with 22 HRs. And the Giants just fucking stink. When I was listening to them play on the radio yesterday... it was just painful. Oh, man, they're really bad. They have some of the best pitching in baseball with Cain and Lincecum, but their ENTIRE offense is laughable. They're seriously bad. In fact, they're so bad, the Pirates start to look pretty good in comparison. At least the Pirates have Jason Bay. Jesus.
Jesus!
And that's that. I hope you've enjoyed my baseball meanderings. Check back at this post in October to see just how mofuckin' right I always am.
In response to Orth's hillarious baseball predictions, I will do my own. But I'm not going to be as funny, because I can't.
AL EAST
1. Boston Red Sox
2. New York Yankees
3. Tampa Bay Rays
4. Toronto Blue Jays
5. Baltimore Orioles
In Orth's predictions he has the Rays at 4th place. Apparently I convinced him that the Rays were talented enough to not end up in last place. Problem is, they're better than the Blue Jays, hands down. The Blue Jays may have the edge on pitching, but overall, the Rays are better-- they have superstar quality position players like Carl Crawford, Carlos Pena, and BJ Upton with Evan Longoria coming up this season to possibly pull off a Ryan Braun-type of a season. Not to mention that Longoria's spot at 3rd means Akinora Iwamura moves to second, thus making that one hell of a solid fucking infield-- Jason Bartlett at SS, from what I hear, plays remarkable defense. Not one week spot. Then their pitching is solid with 3 top notch starters in Kasmir, Shields and Garza, and a whole host of talent, possibly equal to those 3, fighting to get the last two spots in the rotation. In any other division, the Rays are competing for 1st place all season long. Unfortunately the Yankees and Red Sox will own that division forever. That said, I could see the Yanks having a real off season and dropping to 3rd with the Rays shocking everyone and taking 2nd place and competing for the AL Wild Card come September.
AL CENTRAL
1. Detroit Tigers
2. Cleavland Indians
3. Minnesota Twins
4. Kansas City Royals
5. Chicago White Sox
Again, here, I mostly agree with Orth; but, again, I'm switching the 3rd and 4th spots. The Twins no longer have Johann Santana, but they do have Francisco Liriano. Sure Liriano didn't pitch at all in 2007 due to Tommy John surgery, but he should be ready to go this season and he has Santana-esque talent. So, if all goes well, he essentially replaces Santana. I also think Boof Bonser will step up this year to be a seriously good starting pitcher. He has the potential for being a terrific strikeout pitcher. And not to mention that the Twins still have Joe Nathan closing out games for them, as well as one of the best hitting catchers in Joe Mauer. The addition of Delmon Young, I think, makes up for the loss of Tori Hunter. Young will be a better offensive force than Hunter, and his defense is on par; and Young has THE BEST arm of all Major League outfielders-- and yes, that means it's better than Vlad Guerrero's. Also, Carlos Gomez could be a hotshot for the Twins. I love the Royals, but they're not beating out the very consistent Minnesota Twins this year. And like the AL East, there's not much to say about the #1 team, because it almost goes without saying that the Tigers will whomp all over the AL Central. Their lineup is fucking ridiculous, and they have real, real good pitching.
AL WEST
1. L.A. Angels
2. Seattle Mariners
3. Texas Rangers
4. Oakland A's
This division is just not that interesting. I agree with Orth's predictions here. HOWEVER, if the Mariners wise up and sign Barry Bonds to a cheap one-year contract as their DH, that might just be enough of an edge for them to walk away with this division. The Rangers will be a better team because of Jarrod Saltalamachia and Josh Hamilton, and their offense was already pretty strong, and it will only get better. They might surprise everyone and take this division, actually. And the A's just stink. Boy do they stink.
NL EAST
1. NY Mets
2. Philadelphia Phillies
3. Atlanta Braves
4. Washington Nationals
5. Florida Marlins
Once again, I mostly agree with Orth except for those 3rd and 4th spots. The Braves are too solid, too consistent not to at least nab 3rd place. And they have Mark Texiera for the full season in '08. Again, the Braves are a team that I'm picking for 3rd, but could take the division. However, the Braves are less likely than the Rangers because the Mets are just too strong with the addition of Johann Santana, and the Phillies fortified their pitching by moving Brett Myers back into the rotation and signing Brad Lidge as their closer. And they've improved their infield from last season with the addition of Pedro Feliz who will play Gold Glove-caliber defense and knock in about 30 HRs due to the smaller ballpark he now calls home.
NL CENTRAL
1. Chicago Cubs
2. Milwaukee Brewers
3. Reds
4. Houston Astros
5. St. Louis Cardinals
6. Pittsburgh Pirates
Yes, that's right, the Cubs will take the NL Central. They did last season, and they're even better this year with the addition of Kosuke Fokudome, who, from all the reports I've read, *will* be like a cross between Ichiro and Matzusaka. On top of that, I think Rich Hill is prone for a break-out year, and Felix Pie will provide terrific defense in center all season long. The Reds have a great team, but Dusty Baker will break all of those pitchers arms when he leaves them out there for 140/ 145 pitches per game. And the Cardinals fucking blow. If it wasn't for Pujols, they may as well call themselves the St. Louis Pirates.
NL WEST
1. Arizona Diamondbacks
2. Colorado Rockies
3. San Diego Padres
4. L.A. Dodgers
5. S.F. Giants
Ah, yes. My beloved NL West. Oh, Giants, why have you forsaken me so? Actually, it's all yr fault Brian Sabean. OFF WITH HIS HEAD! OFF WITH HIS HEAD! Anyway, yeah, the D'backs have Dan Haren now and their pitching wasn't too shabby last year when they won the division. They're going to roll over the west for that reason, and also because the youth that helped them get to the playoffs last year will be better for their experience. Chris Young, for instance, is going to have a MONSTER season, and Stephen Drew is going to finally get his shit together and hit .290 with 22 HRs. And the Giants just fucking stink. When I was listening to them play on the radio yesterday... it was just painful. Oh, man, they're really bad. They have some of the best pitching in baseball with Cain and Lincecum, but their ENTIRE offense is laughable. They're seriously bad. In fact, they're so bad, the Pirates start to look pretty good in comparison. At least the Pirates have Jason Bay. Jesus.
Jesus!
And that's that. I hope you've enjoyed my baseball meanderings. Check back at this post in October to see just how mofuckin' right I always am.
Labels: baseball
¶ 1:22 PM 3 comments
Thursday, February 28, 2008
from SI.com:
Someone who recently saw [Barry] Bonds said he didn't appear to be in his usual extraordinary condition. But Borris disputed that. "He's in phenomenal shape," Borris said. "All he needs is someone to throw to him."
Ahhhh. That almost made me feel bad for him. Okay, that did make me feel bad for Barry Bonds. His agent exclaiming, "Screw you! There's nothing wrong with Bonds! Nothing! Only that your kids won't play with my kid! Why won't they play with my kid???"
Poor guy.
I actually really want Bonds to sign with some AL team; I just didn't want him on my Giants anymore-- because Bonds betrayed his Giants fans, and also because the Giants obviously needed to start building the team differently; and they couldn't do that with Bonds still limping around left field and distracting the kids in the clubhouse with his humungous head and ego and media entourage.
Bonds can still knock the shit out of the ball. If he were to DH for some AL team, I'm positive he'd be able to perform better offensively than he did last season, in which he had an OPS over 1.000 (which is fucking phenomenal, by the way).
Plus, just out of curiosity, I'd like to see how Bonds handles himself with a team that hasn't been powdering his ass for the last 15 seasons. I wonder if he'd be forced to be a different person, a different teammate.
Let's hope he signs before Opening Day. The Seattle Mariners, if they have half a brain, should come knocking.
Someone who recently saw [Barry] Bonds said he didn't appear to be in his usual extraordinary condition. But Borris disputed that. "He's in phenomenal shape," Borris said. "All he needs is someone to throw to him."
Ahhhh. That almost made me feel bad for him. Okay, that did make me feel bad for Barry Bonds. His agent exclaiming, "Screw you! There's nothing wrong with Bonds! Nothing! Only that your kids won't play with my kid! Why won't they play with my kid???"
Poor guy.
I actually really want Bonds to sign with some AL team; I just didn't want him on my Giants anymore-- because Bonds betrayed his Giants fans, and also because the Giants obviously needed to start building the team differently; and they couldn't do that with Bonds still limping around left field and distracting the kids in the clubhouse with his humungous head and ego and media entourage.
Bonds can still knock the shit out of the ball. If he were to DH for some AL team, I'm positive he'd be able to perform better offensively than he did last season, in which he had an OPS over 1.000 (which is fucking phenomenal, by the way).
Plus, just out of curiosity, I'd like to see how Bonds handles himself with a team that hasn't been powdering his ass for the last 15 seasons. I wonder if he'd be forced to be a different person, a different teammate.
Let's hope he signs before Opening Day. The Seattle Mariners, if they have half a brain, should come knocking.
Labels: Barry Bonds, baseball
¶ 4:14 PM 0 comments
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
HAPPY MOFUCKIN' FIRST DAY OF SPRING TRAINING GAMES!
HOLY SHIT!
HOTY SHIT!
I HEAR BASEBALL ON THE RADIO! I HEAR BASEBALL ON THE RADIO!
HOLY SHIT!
HALLELUJAH!
HOLY SHIT!
Labels: baseball
¶ 10:03 AM 2 comments
Wednesday, February 13, 2008
Friday, January 18, 2008
.
MY REVISED TOP 5 FAVORITE NL & AL TEAMS
National League
1. San Francisco Giants
2. Chicago Cubs
3. Arizona Diamondbacks
4. Florida Marlins
5. Philadelphia Phillies
American League
1. Tampa Bay Rays
2. Kansas City Royals
3. Oakland Athletics
4. Detroit Tigers
5. Toronto Blue Jays
Honestly, after the top two in each league, it's a crapshoot. Three thru five could change at will. It depends on what the 2008 teams look like. And I still feel real bad for including the Arizona Diamondbacks in my top 5, but I cannot tell a lie! They're a fun team to watch!
MY REVISED TOP 5 FAVORITE NL & AL TEAMS
National League
1. San Francisco Giants
2. Chicago Cubs
3. Arizona Diamondbacks
4. Florida Marlins
5. Philadelphia Phillies
American League
1. Tampa Bay Rays
2. Kansas City Royals
3. Oakland Athletics
4. Detroit Tigers
5. Toronto Blue Jays
Honestly, after the top two in each league, it's a crapshoot. Three thru five could change at will. It depends on what the 2008 teams look like. And I still feel real bad for including the Arizona Diamondbacks in my top 5, but I cannot tell a lie! They're a fun team to watch!
Labels: baseball
¶ 10:15 AM 0 comments
Wednesday, December 19, 2007
I am taking the lead from the McCovey Chronicles and most of its readers and will no longer refer to the Giants ballpark as the corporate sponsored name. From here on out I will only refer to the ballpark as MAYS FIELD. I suggest everyone else does the same for Mays Field and all other ballparks with soulless corporate sponsored names. If we all give our team's ballpark a name and are consistent with it, then it doesn't matter what name is actually glowing in lights outside of it. It's a lot like Candlestick Park, named so because it's out on Candlestick Point. That stadium was renamed a few things finally ending up on 3Com Park (I think, it might have changed by now), but everyone still calls that park Candlestick, so much so that the announcers often forget they *have to* call the park 3Com.Anyway, I know the Giants are set up to have another EMBARASSING season, but I can't wait to get out to Mays Field for a game.
Oh, April, why do you allude me so???!!!
Labels: baseball
¶ 9:33 AM 3 comments
Wednesday, December 12, 2007
BRIAN "SHIT FOR BRAINS" SABEAN DOES IT AGAIN
.
The Giants just signed Aaron Rowand to a 5-year contract worth $60million. One of the very few good things about this signing is that the Giants didn't have to trade anyone away to get another outfielder, which Brian Sabean seemed hell-bent on doing this offseason.
The Giants are currently in a rebuilding phase, and right now the Giants needs are not for a centerfielder (which they already have 3 of!), but for a thirdbaseman, first and foremost, and a firstbaseman, secondly. For the record, here's a list of all the Giants outfielders now:
Dave Roberts (CF)
Rajai Davis (CF)
Nate Schierholtz (LF)
Fred Lewis (RF, LF)
Randy Winn (RF, CF)
Dan Ortmeier (LF, though he played 1B last season)
Aaron Rowand (CF)
and there are a handful of other possible outfielders in the Giants farm system
Before the signing of Rowand today, the Giants would have played Roberts at center where, hopefully, Rajai Davis would have usurped him early on in the season as the everyday starter. Winn, of course, is locked in at right, and Schierholtz would have *actually* been given the opportunity to prove himself as an everyday starter in left. When rebuilding the idea is to LET THE KIDS PLAY, and not to go out and spend $60mil on a centerfielder with average offense abilities to a team with outfielders coming out of their ass.
The thing that really stinks about this is not only that Fred Lewis (who hit for the cycle last season, and even had a grand slam, I think, and has "star potential") will be left completely out of the picture, once again. I have to imagine that he's going to be traded now that the Giants have signed Rowand. But, really, the thing that stinks is that if a team with plenty of outfielders is going after more outfielders, then that team should only be doing that if they're positive they can upgrade--and that's where the biggest problem with this is.
In signing an outfielder I think it's safe to say that the Giants should be signing someone with much better numbers than Randy Winn.
Winn's career AVG/ OBP/ SLG is .286/ .345/ .424
Rowand's is .286/ .343/ .462
Uh... er... erm... um... KINDA THE SAME FUCKING THING!!!
Now, there are some intangibles to a guy like Aaron Rowand, and the most important one is that this guy is a gamer. He'll put his fucking hand in a fire if it meant throwing a guy out from CF to homeplate. But is it worth a 5-year contract worth $12 million a year? I don't think so. Not when yr OBP is below .350 and yr offensive production is average.
Brian Sabean is the stupidest GM in baseball. Or, he's just as stupid as the Houston Astros GM, who just sent a whole lotta young talent over to the Orioles for the declining talents of one Miguel Tejada. How do these people get these jobs?
Brian Sabean, I'm callin' you out. Meet me by the flag pole at 3:30... or else!
The Giants just signed Aaron Rowand to a 5-year contract worth $60million. One of the very few good things about this signing is that the Giants didn't have to trade anyone away to get another outfielder, which Brian Sabean seemed hell-bent on doing this offseason.
The Giants are currently in a rebuilding phase, and right now the Giants needs are not for a centerfielder (which they already have 3 of!), but for a thirdbaseman, first and foremost, and a firstbaseman, secondly. For the record, here's a list of all the Giants outfielders now:
Dave Roberts (CF)
Rajai Davis (CF)
Nate Schierholtz (LF)
Fred Lewis (RF, LF)
Randy Winn (RF, CF)
Dan Ortmeier (LF, though he played 1B last season)
Aaron Rowand (CF)
and there are a handful of other possible outfielders in the Giants farm system
Before the signing of Rowand today, the Giants would have played Roberts at center where, hopefully, Rajai Davis would have usurped him early on in the season as the everyday starter. Winn, of course, is locked in at right, and Schierholtz would have *actually* been given the opportunity to prove himself as an everyday starter in left. When rebuilding the idea is to LET THE KIDS PLAY, and not to go out and spend $60mil on a centerfielder with average offense abilities to a team with outfielders coming out of their ass.
The thing that really stinks about this is not only that Fred Lewis (who hit for the cycle last season, and even had a grand slam, I think, and has "star potential") will be left completely out of the picture, once again. I have to imagine that he's going to be traded now that the Giants have signed Rowand. But, really, the thing that stinks is that if a team with plenty of outfielders is going after more outfielders, then that team should only be doing that if they're positive they can upgrade--and that's where the biggest problem with this is.
In signing an outfielder I think it's safe to say that the Giants should be signing someone with much better numbers than Randy Winn.
Winn's career AVG/ OBP/ SLG is .286/ .345/ .424
Rowand's is .286/ .343/ .462
Uh... er... erm... um... KINDA THE SAME FUCKING THING!!!
Now, there are some intangibles to a guy like Aaron Rowand, and the most important one is that this guy is a gamer. He'll put his fucking hand in a fire if it meant throwing a guy out from CF to homeplate. But is it worth a 5-year contract worth $12 million a year? I don't think so. Not when yr OBP is below .350 and yr offensive production is average.
Brian Sabean is the stupidest GM in baseball. Or, he's just as stupid as the Houston Astros GM, who just sent a whole lotta young talent over to the Orioles for the declining talents of one Miguel Tejada. How do these people get these jobs?
Brian Sabean, I'm callin' you out. Meet me by the flag pole at 3:30... or else!
Labels: baseball, Brian Sabean, San Francisco Giants
¶ 2:01 PM 1 comments
Tuesday, December 04, 2007
THE UNEDITED BASEBALL MEANDERINGS OF THE LRS & THE CHRIS GRANT
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This is just a Myspace exchange from today for those who love baseball bull-talk (AKA: da push-down post):
LRS: actually, considering how ridiculously slow last year's hotstove was, this year seems like a blast. i mean, the recent trade of delmon young to the twins for matt garza is pretty exciting. i mean, the twins now have THE BEST ARM in major league baseball's OF, and YES that mean's it's better than vlad g. and, of course, young is going to only get better offenisively. while on the other side, the rays pitching is suddenly VERY respectable what with SHIELDS, KAZMIR and GARZA leading off that rotation. i mean, that rotation now has the potentional for being THE MOFUCKIN' SHIT, yo.
i really like young and the rays, but i think the rays made a terrific move there. not to mention that now their bullpen has WHEELER, REYES, and PERCIVAL for the 7th, 8th and 9th innings respectively.
AND THEN!
AND THEN! on top of all that, the ray offense is ridiculous.
god, they're going to be a seriously fucking good team real soon.
anyway, yeah, if a-rod had gone elsewhere, that may have been more exciting. hopefully the marlins stop being so stubborn and let go of cabrerra for a reasonable price, though i'm not too excited to see him go somewhere like the angels--BORING!
i'm hoping the giants DO NOT trade for miguel tejada. that'd be stupid. stupid. stupid. stupid. what the giants need to do is find out how they can land edwin encarnacion from the reds.
anyway, yr red sox aren't going to land santana. sorry. the yanks package is better and makes more sense for the twins.
see, the hot stove's not too shabby.
but i still want the season back RIGHT. FUCKING. NOW!
CG: God - you are the most hard core baseball fan I know. Anyone who gets excited by Delmon Young for Matt Garza is just a little bit crazy for besbol.
I applaud your support of the Rays, but lets be honest - until they move, or change divisions, Tampa Bay is never going to do shit - and you know this. They have a lot of good young players and I, for one, can't wait for my fellow Texan Carl Crawford to start playing for the Red Sox. However, they don't have the dollars needed to compete with the Sox or Yankees. It's a sorry thing to say, but it's the truth. As soon as Kazmir and Crawford and Upton and the rest of them get close to free agency they're gonna get traded or they'll be lost on the open market. They should move Tampa to another city where they can get some support or, even better, they should be contracted along w/the Fish and a few other teams as well. But what do I know - all I know about is make believe.
LRS: the rays are awesome. the only thing not awesome about them is that they changed their name from "devil rays" to plain old "rays," which is not even short for their previous name, but with a WHOLE OTHER MEANING altogether--i.e., "rays of sunshine." to which i say PUKE. i also say PUKE to them changing their uni's. those green uni's were kind of my favorite, and no one else had uni's like them. now they look like the padres, or the brewers or something. BOOOOO.
but, hey, listen, if every year people can believe that toronto might be in contention, there's no reason to believe that tampa can't either. tampa's pitching might not be equal to toronto (and that NOW is a BIG "might not"), but tb's offense is superior.
here's a hint as to the way i roll in baseball: my other favorite AL team is (drumroll please) THE ROYALS! with my boys billy "butterball" butler and alex "a-gord" gordon leading the way with mark teahen tearing shit up in the OF, they'll be a FORCE TO FUCKIN' BE MOFUCKIN' RECKONED WITH! and what with zack "i'm scared o' people" grienke making opponets' bats explode, and gil "show me da money" meche linin' 'em up and KOCKIN' 'EM DOWN, well, you know what they say: THERE GOES THE NEIGHBORHOOD!
I.
LOVE.
BASEBALL!!!!
AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!
CG: It seems you just set yourself up for disappointment with your choice of AL teams. However, if I were to start picking teams to root for I wouldn't choose the Red Sox - it's no fun to start jumping on the bandwagon of good teams. It's better to get in on the ground floor and (hopefully) watch them get better. This was my plan when I started rooting for the Houston Texans - it still has not panned out for me, but I have hope. Still, I guess one day the Giants might be relevant again.
I'd contract the Royals too. Actually, if I were in charge of baseball I'd put in a salary cap and then every team could be competitive, but that's never going to happen.
I was not aware of the change to the Rays name and uni's. I completely agree w/you though. Why'd they change? Were Devil Rays all over the world protesting? Or did it have to do w/the whole Devil thing? Man, if that's the case that's just stupid. Also isn't it always kinda funny people want to paint the Blue Jays as having a chance in the AL East? I think 2 years ago they finished second - something like 20 games back of the Yankees. I guess if a team does a good job of grooming young talent they can have a small window of time where they can be relevant (like the Brewers) but then the Yankees will swoop in and take their talent. Oh - and I read on the Globe today the Sox and Twins have exchanged medical files on Santana and Lester. Looks like Santana and Beckett are fixin' to form the best 1-2 punch in baseball and I'll be 'celebrating' another world series win again next year.
LRS: okay, here's how it should go. i'm not for all this contraction stuff. i mean, seriously??? the royals have a fucking HISTORY, man. HISTORY. uh, george brett ring any bells??? and you want to ERASE them from baseball??? whhaaaaaaaa????
but, here's how it should go. okay, tampa bay gets moved to portland (or sacramento) and plays in the AL West. then, move texas to the AL Central, and move the white sox to the AL East, and everything's cozy and kosher again.
ain't i a genius?
and then it'll be the rays and angels duking it out each year for the western division championship.
no contractions!!!
CG: If 30 years a history makes, then the Royals have history. Actually I always kinda liked the Royals when I was a kid - Amos Otis, Willie Wilson, Willie Akins, UL Washington - those guys were some of my favorites (besides the Sox of course).
I wouldn't really contract the Royals. The Rays and Marlins however are a different story. Also I think they should get rid of the Pirates which is just stupid. Pittsburgh is one of the original franchises and has a real history but they don't compete and they don't really get that many fans either.
Okay - how's this for a solution - break baseball up into two leagues but stock one league with the half of the teams who spend the most money and stock the other with the bottom half. Do away with interleague play and then have the winner of each league meet in the World Series. That would be fucking cool. The rich vs. the poor. I would think that the poor team should be able to compete in a 7-game series - I mean teams beat the Yankees in the playoffs all the time.
Damn, I'm a genious. Also I would move the Rays to either San Antonio or Austin. Austin's AAA team holds pretty much every minor league baseball attendance record and SA is one of the 10 largest cities in the country - that would guarantee the team plenty of fan support.
LRS: ps
from yr last comment on my page:
"Damn, I'm a genious."
ha!
and, back to baseball: the giants keep getting a lot of shit for how shitty they are, but it keeps being overlooked that, while, yes, they are rebuilding big time, they are NOT, in fact, in need of the MOST EXPENSIVE parts of the puzzle: pitching. to me that means their rebuilding won't take as long as it does for most teams to rebuild.
here's how it should go for the giants:
1) trade benji molina for whatever they can get. he is good for the team but not part of their future. it doesn't matter who's catching in '08 if '08 is a losing season.
2) let ortmeir play 1B all year, pretty much no matter what.
3) put frandsen at 3B, or make durham be HIS backup at 2B.
4) put rajai davis in center (roberts plays HIS backup), fred lewis in left, winn in right.
5) if none of the kids work out, throw money at the problem NEXT offseason when the FA class will be much more enticing.
wahlah.
i'm still a genius. i should be the giants GM.
CG: I'm a genius, not a genious speller!
I agree w/you on the Giants. Let the kids play. There's no reason for them to keep trotting out those old guys and lose. That's why I was surprised they resigned Vizquel. Don't they have a youngster waiting to come up at SS? They do have nice pitching, but I don't know how much I'd be relying on Barry Zito. And you're right - you should be the Giants GM.
LRS: the giants do have a kid at ss, but he's, um, 16 or 17. seriously. he's supposed to be the gargantuan shiznit, but it'll be a while. in any case, i totally f'n <3 omar, so it's okay with me. plus, he should be the giants manager in 10 years or less. i'm down. as for the giants pitching, here's how it'll eventually end up, in order of rotation spots: LINCECUM, CAIN, BUMGARNER, LOWRY, ZITO. i'm okay with a rotation that has zito at its end. and there's actually a bunch of other names i could throw out that could take any of the last three spots. MERKIN VALDEZ for mofuckin' one. he'll be back next season, actually. he's supposed to be a francisco liriano type. NOW, as for contracting the marlins. can you really suggest contracting a team that has 2 world series victories under their belt in their short existence??? nay! NAY I SAY! just move them somewhere. god, it shouldn't be so hard to move a team. there's plenty of places that want one. it'd be nice for the two florida teams to go to states that don't have a major league team--that's why is say PORTLAND for the rays and either LAS VEGAS or maybe BOISE or something for the marlins.
CG: Boise???
I'm guessing that was a joke. Portland would be cool. I still think the part of Texas I live in would be an ideal spot - tons of people, love of the game.
I guess you could move the Marlins instead of contract them, but you should do something. I don't care if they've won 2 WS, they played games last year where their attendance was under 1000. That's just pathetic.
LRS: cabrera AND dontrelle willis to the tigers?ca-ca-ca-RAZY!
CG: That's the kind of blockbuster shit that warms up the hot stove league. I'm not all that sold on Dontrelle any more and his ERA is gonna take the usual 1 pt bump up. But still, you've got to love the big time names changing teams. Since the fish are dumping all their talent I wish they'd send Hanley back to the Sox. There's a guy I wish hadn't gotten away.
Oh - and the Tigers lineup is just going to be sick.
C - I-Rod
1B - Carlos Guillen
2B - Placido Polanco
3B - Miguel Cabrera
SS - Edgar Renteria
OF - Jacque Jones
OF - Curtis Granderson
OF - Magglio Ordonez
DH - Sheffield
That seems to be to be just about as good as it can get. Plus they already had all those good young arms. I've got to believe they're going to be the favorite to unseat the Sox next year.
This is just a Myspace exchange from today for those who love baseball bull-talk (AKA: da push-down post):
LRS: actually, considering how ridiculously slow last year's hotstove was, this year seems like a blast. i mean, the recent trade of delmon young to the twins for matt garza is pretty exciting. i mean, the twins now have THE BEST ARM in major league baseball's OF, and YES that mean's it's better than vlad g. and, of course, young is going to only get better offenisively. while on the other side, the rays pitching is suddenly VERY respectable what with SHIELDS, KAZMIR and GARZA leading off that rotation. i mean, that rotation now has the potentional for being THE MOFUCKIN' SHIT, yo.
i really like young and the rays, but i think the rays made a terrific move there. not to mention that now their bullpen has WHEELER, REYES, and PERCIVAL for the 7th, 8th and 9th innings respectively.
AND THEN!
AND THEN! on top of all that, the ray offense is ridiculous.
god, they're going to be a seriously fucking good team real soon.
anyway, yeah, if a-rod had gone elsewhere, that may have been more exciting. hopefully the marlins stop being so stubborn and let go of cabrerra for a reasonable price, though i'm not too excited to see him go somewhere like the angels--BORING!
i'm hoping the giants DO NOT trade for miguel tejada. that'd be stupid. stupid. stupid. stupid. what the giants need to do is find out how they can land edwin encarnacion from the reds.
anyway, yr red sox aren't going to land santana. sorry. the yanks package is better and makes more sense for the twins.
see, the hot stove's not too shabby.
but i still want the season back RIGHT. FUCKING. NOW!
CG: God - you are the most hard core baseball fan I know. Anyone who gets excited by Delmon Young for Matt Garza is just a little bit crazy for besbol.
I applaud your support of the Rays, but lets be honest - until they move, or change divisions, Tampa Bay is never going to do shit - and you know this. They have a lot of good young players and I, for one, can't wait for my fellow Texan Carl Crawford to start playing for the Red Sox. However, they don't have the dollars needed to compete with the Sox or Yankees. It's a sorry thing to say, but it's the truth. As soon as Kazmir and Crawford and Upton and the rest of them get close to free agency they're gonna get traded or they'll be lost on the open market. They should move Tampa to another city where they can get some support or, even better, they should be contracted along w/the Fish and a few other teams as well. But what do I know - all I know about is make believe.
LRS: the rays are awesome. the only thing not awesome about them is that they changed their name from "devil rays" to plain old "rays," which is not even short for their previous name, but with a WHOLE OTHER MEANING altogether--i.e., "rays of sunshine." to which i say PUKE. i also say PUKE to them changing their uni's. those green uni's were kind of my favorite, and no one else had uni's like them. now they look like the padres, or the brewers or something. BOOOOO.
but, hey, listen, if every year people can believe that toronto might be in contention, there's no reason to believe that tampa can't either. tampa's pitching might not be equal to toronto (and that NOW is a BIG "might not"), but tb's offense is superior.
here's a hint as to the way i roll in baseball: my other favorite AL team is (drumroll please) THE ROYALS! with my boys billy "butterball" butler and alex "a-gord" gordon leading the way with mark teahen tearing shit up in the OF, they'll be a FORCE TO FUCKIN' BE MOFUCKIN' RECKONED WITH! and what with zack "i'm scared o' people" grienke making opponets' bats explode, and gil "show me da money" meche linin' 'em up and KOCKIN' 'EM DOWN, well, you know what they say: THERE GOES THE NEIGHBORHOOD!
I.
LOVE.
BASEBALL!!!!
AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!
CG: It seems you just set yourself up for disappointment with your choice of AL teams. However, if I were to start picking teams to root for I wouldn't choose the Red Sox - it's no fun to start jumping on the bandwagon of good teams. It's better to get in on the ground floor and (hopefully) watch them get better. This was my plan when I started rooting for the Houston Texans - it still has not panned out for me, but I have hope. Still, I guess one day the Giants might be relevant again.
I'd contract the Royals too. Actually, if I were in charge of baseball I'd put in a salary cap and then every team could be competitive, but that's never going to happen.
I was not aware of the change to the Rays name and uni's. I completely agree w/you though. Why'd they change? Were Devil Rays all over the world protesting? Or did it have to do w/the whole Devil thing? Man, if that's the case that's just stupid. Also isn't it always kinda funny people want to paint the Blue Jays as having a chance in the AL East? I think 2 years ago they finished second - something like 20 games back of the Yankees. I guess if a team does a good job of grooming young talent they can have a small window of time where they can be relevant (like the Brewers) but then the Yankees will swoop in and take their talent. Oh - and I read on the Globe today the Sox and Twins have exchanged medical files on Santana and Lester. Looks like Santana and Beckett are fixin' to form the best 1-2 punch in baseball and I'll be 'celebrating' another world series win again next year.
LRS: okay, here's how it should go. i'm not for all this contraction stuff. i mean, seriously??? the royals have a fucking HISTORY, man. HISTORY. uh, george brett ring any bells??? and you want to ERASE them from baseball??? whhaaaaaaaa????
but, here's how it should go. okay, tampa bay gets moved to portland (or sacramento) and plays in the AL West. then, move texas to the AL Central, and move the white sox to the AL East, and everything's cozy and kosher again.
ain't i a genius?
and then it'll be the rays and angels duking it out each year for the western division championship.
no contractions!!!
CG: If 30 years a history makes, then the Royals have history. Actually I always kinda liked the Royals when I was a kid - Amos Otis, Willie Wilson, Willie Akins, UL Washington - those guys were some of my favorites (besides the Sox of course).
I wouldn't really contract the Royals. The Rays and Marlins however are a different story. Also I think they should get rid of the Pirates which is just stupid. Pittsburgh is one of the original franchises and has a real history but they don't compete and they don't really get that many fans either.
Okay - how's this for a solution - break baseball up into two leagues but stock one league with the half of the teams who spend the most money and stock the other with the bottom half. Do away with interleague play and then have the winner of each league meet in the World Series. That would be fucking cool. The rich vs. the poor. I would think that the poor team should be able to compete in a 7-game series - I mean teams beat the Yankees in the playoffs all the time.
Damn, I'm a genious. Also I would move the Rays to either San Antonio or Austin. Austin's AAA team holds pretty much every minor league baseball attendance record and SA is one of the 10 largest cities in the country - that would guarantee the team plenty of fan support.
LRS: ps
from yr last comment on my page:
"Damn, I'm a genious."
ha!
and, back to baseball: the giants keep getting a lot of shit for how shitty they are, but it keeps being overlooked that, while, yes, they are rebuilding big time, they are NOT, in fact, in need of the MOST EXPENSIVE parts of the puzzle: pitching. to me that means their rebuilding won't take as long as it does for most teams to rebuild.
here's how it should go for the giants:
1) trade benji molina for whatever they can get. he is good for the team but not part of their future. it doesn't matter who's catching in '08 if '08 is a losing season.
2) let ortmeir play 1B all year, pretty much no matter what.
3) put frandsen at 3B, or make durham be HIS backup at 2B.
4) put rajai davis in center (roberts plays HIS backup), fred lewis in left, winn in right.
5) if none of the kids work out, throw money at the problem NEXT offseason when the FA class will be much more enticing.
wahlah.
i'm still a genius. i should be the giants GM.
CG: I'm a genius, not a genious speller!
I agree w/you on the Giants. Let the kids play. There's no reason for them to keep trotting out those old guys and lose. That's why I was surprised they resigned Vizquel. Don't they have a youngster waiting to come up at SS? They do have nice pitching, but I don't know how much I'd be relying on Barry Zito. And you're right - you should be the Giants GM.
LRS: the giants do have a kid at ss, but he's, um, 16 or 17. seriously. he's supposed to be the gargantuan shiznit, but it'll be a while. in any case, i totally f'n <3 omar, so it's okay with me. plus, he should be the giants manager in 10 years or less. i'm down. as for the giants pitching, here's how it'll eventually end up, in order of rotation spots: LINCECUM, CAIN, BUMGARNER, LOWRY, ZITO. i'm okay with a rotation that has zito at its end. and there's actually a bunch of other names i could throw out that could take any of the last three spots. MERKIN VALDEZ for mofuckin' one. he'll be back next season, actually. he's supposed to be a francisco liriano type. NOW, as for contracting the marlins. can you really suggest contracting a team that has 2 world series victories under their belt in their short existence??? nay! NAY I SAY! just move them somewhere. god, it shouldn't be so hard to move a team. there's plenty of places that want one. it'd be nice for the two florida teams to go to states that don't have a major league team--that's why is say PORTLAND for the rays and either LAS VEGAS or maybe BOISE or something for the marlins.
CG: Boise???
I'm guessing that was a joke. Portland would be cool. I still think the part of Texas I live in would be an ideal spot - tons of people, love of the game.
I guess you could move the Marlins instead of contract them, but you should do something. I don't care if they've won 2 WS, they played games last year where their attendance was under 1000. That's just pathetic.
LRS: cabrera AND dontrelle willis to the tigers?ca-ca-ca-RAZY!
CG: That's the kind of blockbuster shit that warms up the hot stove league. I'm not all that sold on Dontrelle any more and his ERA is gonna take the usual 1 pt bump up. But still, you've got to love the big time names changing teams. Since the fish are dumping all their talent I wish they'd send Hanley back to the Sox. There's a guy I wish hadn't gotten away.
Oh - and the Tigers lineup is just going to be sick.
C - I-Rod
1B - Carlos Guillen
2B - Placido Polanco
3B - Miguel Cabrera
SS - Edgar Renteria
OF - Jacque Jones
OF - Curtis Granderson
OF - Magglio Ordonez
DH - Sheffield
That seems to be to be just about as good as it can get. Plus they already had all those good young arms. I've got to believe they're going to be the favorite to unseat the Sox next year.
Labels: baseball
¶ 12:07 PM 15 comments
Thursday, November 15, 2007
Monday, November 12, 2007
"When Barry Bonds reclines in the clubhouse, he drips clubhouse cancer all over the floor, and children can slip on the puddles of clubhouse cancer and die."
Labels: baseball
¶ 4:11 PM 0 comments
Monday, October 29, 2007
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I think I strained my oblique AND pulled my hammy. I guess it's a good thing it's the offseason. I wouldn't be able to throw my wicked slider or show off my blazing speed on the basepaths for awhile anyway.
Sigh.
I think I strained my oblique AND pulled my hammy. I guess it's a good thing it's the offseason. I wouldn't be able to throw my wicked slider or show off my blazing speed on the basepaths for awhile anyway.
Sigh.
Labels: baseball
¶ 5:33 PM 0 comments
